Wish you were closer with your mother, less irritated? Regardless of the past, you can take steps right now to create a better relationship with her.  

• Warm her heart by telling your mother what you like and love about her.
• Forgive mistakes. No matter what happened, she did her best with the resources she had available to her. Parenting is a hard job. 
• Remember that relationships are like a dance. If you change your steps by being more positive with your mother, she is more likely to respond in kind. 
• Ask your mother what she remembers about you as a child, and learn more about yourself.
• Learn more about your mother by taping her life story. You will understand more about her and it will create a warm bond between you
• If you need to challenge your mother, get clear about what you want, then use an “I statement” about how you feel rather than “you always or you never”. 
• If a triggering behavior such as criticism keeps happening, try a new response. You might say “that’s not a view I agree with” and walk away.
• Don’t let death stop you dealing with unfinished emotional business. It is never too late. Write out your feelings in a letter to your mother or get a friend or counsellor to listen so you can complete with her.
Call Grace Gerry, Counsellor today 250.370-2254 for a complimentary 20 min phone consult. grace@gracefulsolutions.ca
Tips On Having A Closer Relationship With Your Mother
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